
I think that perhaps I should tell some stories that are ‘interesting” observations, moments or events that have happened to me*. Seeing as this is a blog that mainly is about my thoughts then it seems to make sense, doesn’t it? If not, stop reading. Ill humour myself for a little.
On Sunday I flew to BrisVegas to present at Griffith University with Al, the Director of my department. Our presentation was at about 10.30, after which we had lunch (with a nice beer) then headed to the QANTAS Club to wait till out 4.15 flight (we arrived at the club at about 2.30). Well… I had about three beers in that time but most importantly, skulled the last and broke the seal. This, as was blatantly obvious at the time, was not a particularly wise move. I got on the plane and proceeded to have two more beers, not needing to go to the loo too much, but maintaining an underlying debate of whether or not I should go and relieve myself. Being the over thinker I am, I decided not to disturb the gent next to me and to wait it out - after all, it wasn’t too bad. I also thought that I may break the seal again and be in trouble on the way down. WOW, did I not know what was in stall.
The nightmare began during the decent, after the seatbelt sign had been on for about ten minutes. I think we hit a few bumps and I suddenly had to piss like a race horse. I was seriously thinking of ways to get off the plane without people noticing that I’d pissed my pants. I pressed the call button to see if a flight attendant would come and let me up, but we were too far into the decent so there was no hope. I started to rock my legs back and forth like crazy to take my mind off the burning desire to slash outside off. Fortunately the bloke next to me had a laugh about it, so I was able to take my mind off it. After mentioning it to Al, he noted that I would be sacked if I pissed my pants on the plane (somewhat as a joke, but who really wants to piss their pants next to their boss on a plane???). Yes, a very real nightmare covered in urine at 5000 feet.
Without wanting to draw the story out too much more, we had to wait on the tarmac for about five minutes, then taxied all the way to the furthest airport gate from the runway. We were in the middle of the plane so it took a little while to get off, but fortunately I made it up the air bridge and to the loo without spilling a drop. A proud moment, I pissed for about two and a half minutes solidly. I hope there is no internal bleeding or a burst bladder. I have subsequently had cramps & pain in my legs from the violence with which I was rocking them back and forth, but I think its all admissible given I made it out alive, dry and with a job.
On Sunday I flew to BrisVegas to present at Griffith University with Al, the Director of my department. Our presentation was at about 10.30, after which we had lunch (with a nice beer) then headed to the QANTAS Club to wait till out 4.15 flight (we arrived at the club at about 2.30). Well… I had about three beers in that time but most importantly, skulled the last and broke the seal. This, as was blatantly obvious at the time, was not a particularly wise move. I got on the plane and proceeded to have two more beers, not needing to go to the loo too much, but maintaining an underlying debate of whether or not I should go and relieve myself. Being the over thinker I am, I decided not to disturb the gent next to me and to wait it out - after all, it wasn’t too bad. I also thought that I may break the seal again and be in trouble on the way down. WOW, did I not know what was in stall.
The nightmare began during the decent, after the seatbelt sign had been on for about ten minutes. I think we hit a few bumps and I suddenly had to piss like a race horse. I was seriously thinking of ways to get off the plane without people noticing that I’d pissed my pants. I pressed the call button to see if a flight attendant would come and let me up, but we were too far into the decent so there was no hope. I started to rock my legs back and forth like crazy to take my mind off the burning desire to slash outside off. Fortunately the bloke next to me had a laugh about it, so I was able to take my mind off it. After mentioning it to Al, he noted that I would be sacked if I pissed my pants on the plane (somewhat as a joke, but who really wants to piss their pants next to their boss on a plane???). Yes, a very real nightmare covered in urine at 5000 feet.
Without wanting to draw the story out too much more, we had to wait on the tarmac for about five minutes, then taxied all the way to the furthest airport gate from the runway. We were in the middle of the plane so it took a little while to get off, but fortunately I made it up the air bridge and to the loo without spilling a drop. A proud moment, I pissed for about two and a half minutes solidly. I hope there is no internal bleeding or a burst bladder. I have subsequently had cramps & pain in my legs from the violence with which I was rocking them back and forth, but I think its all admissible given I made it out alive, dry and with a job.
* Not that I'm very interesting, nor claim to be
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